Realizing I had arrived at dreaded “old age,” I found it wasn’t as bad as I had expected. It’s like dreading the dentist, then hearing, “You have no cavities.” There actually are benefits to OA. What are they? you ask. Plenty.

More people hold doors open for you, give you and your bottle of Geritol their place in line, and charge you only a small fortune at movie theaters when they see your gray hair.