Years back, I interviewed an American champion speed-eater, competing in a world-class contest in Atlantic City. He wasn’t a big guy at all, medium-weight at most. And he talked real slow, which I definitely wasn’t expecting. But that man could inhale hotdogs like air, which was impressive on the one hand and a bit off-putting on the other. During an early heat, I looked on, all, “I think I’m gonna be sick.”

Despite his astounding down-a-dog pace, he could rarely out stomach his ace rival, a skinny Asian fellow – who came…